Digests from the KALEIDOSCAPES MONTHLY TOPIC
(HOMESCHOOLING) DISCUSSION BOARD


These are the original digests from Kaleidoscapes' MONTHLY TOPIC discussion boards.
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find many of the same wonderful folks who posted on the boards at Network 54.
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Mentoring Digest (part 2)


    MESSAGE:  4H must be really different state-by-state
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 4:39 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: The other half of this month's topic
      Author:  Marsha in MI
        Date:  Thursday, 8 October 1998, at 3:45 p.m.



I don't like 4H because the kids are given those books and expected
to do everything on their own. Nobody teaches them anything except
in the specialty clubs, such as Electric and Dog Obedience. The first
year, my dd did cake decorating and there was absolutely no instruction
at all. *I* never decorated cakes so I couldn't help her. I was just
really put out. After that, I only let them participate in the specialty
clubs.

>

> We did 4-H one year and my kids hated it - the structure,
> the monthly meetings and the running around to classes every
> night of the week (I hated this last part, too!) So we skipped
> it. But we always enjoy looking at all the projects at the
> fair, and the animals, and they sometimes find something
> they want to do. You can order info about a lot of the 4-H
> projects (rabbits for example) from 4-H for a minimal fee
> and do the projects etc. yourself. So that's something we've
> done.

> My second son was involved in a bluebird project for
> a couple springs - monitoring bluebird nest boxes on a walking/biking
> trail. He had a mentor that came and walked with him to
> show him what to do, and he had to keep detailed records
> and send them in to the mentor - they went directly in to
> the DNR! He was the youngest involved in the state at the
> time. He also was inspired to build some nest boxes during
> that time.

> My oldest son took a correspondence course from Foley-Belsaw.
> A lot of those correspondence companies won't let kids take
> the classes. But this was small engine repair and Ryan had
> rebuilt our rototiller and wanted to learn more. He finished
> the course so quickly that he earned another course on transmissions,
> which he also completed, and opened a small engine repair
> shop. He also helped a friend of ours out in his shop -
> he works for Kodak but buys, repairs and sells things with
> small engines - tractors, boats, etc. on the side. Ryan
> learned a lot from him, and then he traded a paint job on
> a farm tractor (our friend knew my husband was a painter
> and had the equipment and would help Ryan out) for a lawn
> tractor. Then this friend saw an ad for someone looking
> for a person to mow their lawn, and he called on them and
> told them what he'd charge for it, said he didn't have time,
> and gave Ryan the number. So Ryan got that job! That was
> the beginning of a complementary small business for him
> and his next younger brother for several years. In fact,
> this summer, my second son mowed as well as working full-time
> for his Dad as a painting apprentice. Pays well! Ryan also
> volunteered as a docent at the local Maritime Museum. I
> saw they were looking for volunteers so called and they
> were used to college age, but said they'd meet Ryan and
> see . . . he charmed the lady in charge and she put him
> into training. That first summer they had a display on Chris-Craft
> that included the boat engines, and all the ladies (retired
> school teachers, all) wanted Ryan to give the tours in that
> exhibit, because he was so enthusiastic about it (he also
> knew what he was talking about when he got questions!!)
> I counted this training and experience as a speech credit,
> but he also won the docent of the month award and got a
> big write-up in the paper.

> Another "out of the home" experience my oldest
> son had was taking automotive technologies at the county
> Intermediate School District. We had to register with the
> state, and thru our local school district. He got permission
> to drive himself, and while there was chosen as student
> of the year both years in his department! (So much for socialization!)
> He also was placed as an Auto-Yes trainee into a dealership
> (kind of a co-op placement with perks), which gained him
> invaluable experience. He's since graduated from Clonlara
> HBEP in Ann Arbor, MI, is attending college his second year
> in Automotive Technologies and works about 30 to 32 hours
> weekly at a local car dealership. He got out of the Auto-Yes
> thing because the dealership wasn't providing him enough
> hours.

> For several years we've had an informal co-op and this
> year we got together and kind of structured it. Had a sign-up
> and made our offerings available thru the newsletter. Some
> of the classes my kids have taken include and are not limited
> to: earth science, chemistry, biology, dissection lab, physics,
> algebra, arts and crafts, creative writing, and elementary
> writing (I teach the last two).

> We also have gone to programs sponsored by the Holland
> Arts Council - these are programs planned around literature
> and folk tales - usually skits, plays and dance programs.
> From memory - Little House on the Prairie, Firebird and
> the Sneetches book by Dr. Seuss.

> My oldest son took a pottery class at the St. Joseph
> Arts Center, and a leaded glass class sponsored by a local
> library. We've always gone to various programs at libraries
> - talks by authors, book signings, programs put on by wildlife
> centers, DNR, local people who've traveled and have slide
> shows, craft programs, programs by local artists, etc. We
> also go to travelogs in two towns - sponsored by the Kiwanis
> - one of them always has entertainment before the film -
> such as Irish Dancing, ballet, keyboard players, piano etc.
>

> And we've paid for lessons in piano, guitar, voice.
> One son took karate through community ed for 2 years. We've
> taken aerobics, cross-stitch, cake decorating, stenciling,
> computers etc. thru community ed.

> My 15 year old passed the assessment test at the community
> college at 14 and has been taking classes there since (dual
> credit for high school and college). He's taken the PSAT
> and PLAN tests mainly for the experience of taking the tests.
>

> When I was a La Leche League Leader, my kids always
> went along and provided built-in "babysitting",
> helped set out the library before meetings, served refreshments,
> whatever. We also belonged to a food co-op for a while,
> and they helped unload the truck, sorted orders, etc.

> Learning is everywhere, not just at home. Life is our
> school.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  It must be! :-(
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 5:25 a.m.

 Response To:  4H must be really different state-by-state
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 4:39 a.m.



> I don't like 4H because the kids are given those books
> and expected to do everything on their own. Nobody teaches
> them anything except in the specialty clubs, such as Electric
> and Dog Obedience. The first year, my dd did cake decorating
> and there was absolutely no instruction at all. *I* never
> decorated cakes so I couldn't help her. I was just really
> put out. After that, I only let them participate in the
> specialty clubs.

We just joined 4H here. It is wonderful. Our club meets twice a month
with summers off.

What do I love about my little 4H club?

VERY VERY VERY family oriented, the leader *demands* that parents
participate with their children. I was overjoyed when they welcomed
my little Rachel (only 4) and told me that even though she is too
young to become a "legal" 4-H member that she could work on a project
and be part of a project sub-group. The leader said it would be great
"4H Training" for her. The group is small so there is lots of individual
attention. The kids picked out their own projects....my son picked
rockets (quite a few other boys did too) and Rachel wanted to join
a group that will be doing arts and crafts.

4H provides great opportunities for leadership, public speaking and
development. And as you get to the older levels---even scholarships!

And yes I agree with Marsha and Jody. Life is education. Education
is Life.

Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Good examples of rural opportunities, Jody
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 6:49 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: The other half of this month's topic
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Thursday, 8 October 1998, at 8:48 p.m.



Jody,

I loved the way your post pointed out some of the differences between
urban and rural opportunities for homeschoolers. It's true that urban
families have easier access to certain kinds of experiences, but I
thought you did a great job of showing the kinds of things rural kids
can get into...like ranching and astronomy and bird-watching. You
can really see those stars out in the country, can't you! :-)

We have homeschooling friends who live in the Big Thicket area of
eastern Texas. THEY have been deeply involved in forestry for several
years, now, and their oldest won college scholarships based on his
work in forestry management.

On the one hand, it goes to show how much our environment shapes our
experience. On the other hand, it also demonstrates the importance
of making the MOST of our environment! No matter where we live, there
are opportunities and features to exploit.

Just a sidebar: I'm amazed by your ability to get videos on interlibrary
loan. We can't do that here! Books and magazine articles, yes -- videos
and audiotapes, no. Phooey! I may have to look into this further.
;-)

>...we sometimes get to see unusual birds uncommon to our area
> in the fall and spring when birds migrate. It's exciting!

Isn't it? We live in a fly-way, too, and for more than just birds,
evidently. A couple of years ago, we looked up and saw the space shuttle
riding on the back of its carrier, directly over our country road.
My son was thrilled to his toenails!

Some days I think we have the best of both worlds, living in the country,
but being close enough to the city to take advantage of its offerings.
Other days I think it's a split-personality lifestyle, and wish we
were either farther out or all the way in! :-D

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  I think it's different club by club
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 7:19 a.m.

 Response To:  4H must be really different state-by-state
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 4:39 a.m.



And thriving 4-H club is a beautiful thing to behold. A languishing
club with only a few active projects and uninvolved parents is a disappointment
for all.

We were 4-H maniacs for 6 years and discovered the old, time-honored
rule: you get out of it what you put into it. I would lead projects
that *I* was interested in -- that way I was willing to put my heart
and soul into the job. These weren't always projects my own kids were
especially drawn to (the computer project comes to mind).

One great thing about 4-H is that it IS interest-driven. The people
involved in any project are there because they have an interest in
that area -- that alone makes for good group dynamics. I loved the
mixing of ages, too. It did my heart good to see older kids helping
younger ones and families working together.

As a project leader, I wasn't one to always "go by the book." The
curriculum was there if I wanted to use it, but we often branched
out and drafted our own goals for the project. In our club, at least,
this was perfectly do-able.

We also looked for help from other people in our community -- people
who weren't necessarily connected to 4-H. For our wildlife project,
I solicited (and got) the cooperation of a wonderful man who was licensed
by the state to rehabilitate sick and injured birds. I was also eligible
to receive free training and materials from "Project Wild," a state-based
wildlife education program for teachers.

In the photography project, we got the help of a professional photographer
who really enjoyed working with the kids and taught them much more
than was "in the books."

We always went to great lengths, in fact, to draw in guest speakers
and project helpers, and this was one thing that really helped make
it a rewarding experience for everyone.

If your daughter had been in our 4-H club and wanted to do a cake
decorating project, we would have tried to help you find a local cake
decorator who was willing to work with children in his or her spare
time! (And of course, we would have prevailed upon you to co-ordinate
the project...*grin!*)

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  About 4H
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 7:26 a.m.

 Response To:  I think it's different club by club
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 7:19 a.m.



> If your daughter had been in our 4-H club and wanted
> to do a cake decorating project, we would have tried to
> help you find a local cake decorator who was willing to
> work with children in his or her spare time! (And of course,
> we would have prevailed upon you to co-ordinate the project...*grin!*)

YES!

This sounds like our club. the parent walks in the director asks,
"What project would you like to lead this year? You can do a project
about whatever you want."

Parental involvement is mandatory.

I forgot to mention another neat little perk about our local 4H club.
Once you are a member you have free and total access to the Orange
County Agricultural Center which has a library of STUFF...wonderful
STUFF (materials, curriculum, information) on every topic imaginable.

Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  WOW!! You guys are really lucky to have 4H like that!
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 1:47 p.m.

 Response To:  4H must be really different state-by-state
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 4:39 a.m.



Ours meets once a month at which time they say pledges, have a couple
kids give demonstrations, eat cookies and go home. Takes about 30
to 45 minutes. Everybody is on their own as far as projects are concerned.
We really love the dog obedience one though. We have a very dedicated
and involved leader and the kids and dogs learn alot. The electric
one is really good too. It sounds like your "regular" clubs are wonderful.
I wonder why the big difference.

> I don't like 4H because the kids are given those books
> and expected to do everything on their own. Nobody teaches
> them anything except in the specialty clubs, such as Electric
> and Dog Obedience. The first year, my dd did cake decorating
> and there was absolutely no instruction at all. *I* never
> decorated cakes so I couldn't help her. I was just really
> put out. After that, I only let them participate in the
> specialty clubs.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Marsha...can you give an address where your son
took the small engine repair course?(nt)
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Saturday, 10 October 1998, at 9:14 p.m.

 Response To:  Marsha! WOW!
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Thursday, 8 October 1998, at 5:17 p.m.



> Thank you SO much for the taking the time to write
> about your family's experiences. I think everyone who reads
> your post will (1) get a clear idea of the endless opportunities
> available to those who go looking for them, and (2) come
> away inspired!

> Well, we hated that part, too. The kids enjoyed it
> more when they were younger, and when they stopped enjoying
> it, we quit. We also had trouble with the heavy emphasis
> on competition, which really didn't jibe with our philosophy.
> It was possible to downplay that element, up to a point,
> but sometimes it just got in the way. Still, there were
> definitely good things about our 4-H experience. I forgot
> to mention that my daughters LOVED the photography project
> and learned a great deal from the professional photographer
> who worked with the kids.

> Much depends on the enthusiasm and organizational skills
> of the club managers, project leaders, and other families
> involved. I imagine most local organizations are similarly
> enhanced or handicapped (Scouts, and so on).

> Wow -- wish we lived close enough for him to take a
> look at mine! :-)

> This closely mirrors our own experience. A kid with
> personality and smarts can usually worm his or her way into
> positions normally reserved for older people. And after
> they've done it once, it's even easier the next time. When
> my younger daughter started volunteering at the museum,
> she was technically too young to enter the teen volunteer
> program -- but they were willing to bend the rules for her
> because she displayed poise and maturity "beyond her
> years."

> I'd like to hear more about your co-op experiences,
> and I'm curious about the size of the homeschooling group
> you belong to. Since you mentioned NOT liking the structure
> and time-consuming aspects of 4-H membership . . . tell
> us how the co-op situation is different, and the elements
> which, in your opinion, have led to its success.

> :-D I'm a retired LLL Leader, too! I guess one thing
> just naturally leads to another... (grin)

> Isn't it the truth? And the proof's in the pudding!
>

> Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Theater Job Shadowing
      AUTHOR:  Belinda
        DATE:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 7:27 a.m.



Hello Ladies,

I haven't been out on the main boards in a while. I was thrilled to
find such a cool topic for the month. :)

I wanted to share an idea that has made itself available to my youngest
child. My eldest is involved in drama classes at the local community
theatre. While dropping her off one afternoon, I found my son conversing
with one of the gentlemen on staff. He was inquiring to lighting,
sound, and set direction classes. Unfortunately, the theatre does
not provide any such classses. About a week later, a gentleman called
and asked if my son would be interested in a job shadowing position.
After listening to the gentlemen, I felt it my duty to inform him
that my son was only 9 yo. He was not at all phased by his age and
believed this was the best age to start this type of mentor program.
Well, he's been working the past couple of weeks and has has had the
opportunity to take control of lighting for some local productions.

So, just because they don't have the programs listed or have maybe
never thought of a mentor program, ASK! We have been very blessed
by this opportunity and I believe it is giving a big boost to my son's
self-esteem. Thanks for letting me share this morning.

Belinda

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Taking charge
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 8:12 a.m.

 Response To:  WOW!! You guys are really lucky to have 4H like that!
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Friday, 9 October 1998, at 1:47 p.m.



Hi, Lee--

You know, IF you have the time, energy, and desire (and that's supposing
a lot, I realize), you could organize a new 4-H club in your area...or
take over (i.e., fundamentally change) the one that already exists.

The character of any organization is simply a reflection of the persons
who give their time to it. That's either good news or bad news, depending
on who's involved. The people who raise their hands and volunteer
and are the ones who get to make decisions. Have you ever read (or
seen) The Best Christmas Pageant Ever? I love that story because it
beautifully illustrates this truth.

We dropped out of 4-H when WE no longer felt like putting in the time
and effort to make it the kind of club we enjoyed. Our attention had
wandered off in other directions, and our energy and dedication went
with it. That could be what's happening in your club -- the folks
in charge may not care that much anymore, and they might be GRATEFUL
to have someone else step in and bring new ideas.

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Theater Job Shadowing
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 8:42 a.m.

 Response To:  Theater Job Shadowing
      Author:  Belinda
        Date:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 7:27 a.m.



Belinda--

What a fantastic opportunity for your son! Job shadowing is a cool
thing...that's what my daughter did at the online services division
of our local newspaper. As I've described elsewhere on this board,
it led to LOTS of other things: speaking engagements, positions of
responsibility, and paid employment. Of course, it looked good on
her resumé, too.

What I really love about your story is the way your son's questions
and display of interest got someone's attention. That's a perfect
example of how this sort of thing usually happens.

A somewhat embittered ex-boyfriend of my daughter's once remarked
to me that the world seemed to hand her everything she wanted on a
silver platter. His comment stunned me at first, and then it made
me downright angry! Maybe -- from a distance -- it seemed that doors
had been opened for her "by magic," but the truth is, my kids have
worked hard for every opportunity that has come their way, and they
have continued to work hard to make the most of those opportunities.

I know a 19-year-old unschooler who has just received a job offer
from a company who's willing to pay him a starting salary of 40K/year.
This job did NOT fall out of the blue sky and land in his lap -- for
several years, he's been devoting much of his time and effort to excelling
in his chosen field (computers). His ability and hard work have earned
him this job.

The ability, of course, began with interest, and the hard work came
naturally because of his interest...AND his parents allowed him to
concentrate on that interest. I don't think they're sorry now! :-D

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Marsha...can you give an address where your son
took the small engine repair course?(nt)
      AUTHOR:  Marsha in MI
        DATE:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 12:11 p.m.

 Response To:  Re: Marsha...can you give an address where your son
took the small engine repair course?(nt)
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Saturday, 10 October 1998, at 9:14 p.m.



Foley Belsaw Institute 6301 Equitable Road P O Box 593 Kansas City,
MO 64141 816) 483-2700

>

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Theater Job Shadowing
      AUTHOR:  Andrea
        DATE:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 7:33 p.m.

 Response To:  Theater Job Shadowing
      Author:  Belinda
        Date:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 7:27 a.m.



> Hello Ladies,

> I haven't been out on the main boards in a while. I
> was thrilled to find such a cool topic for the month. :)
>

> I wanted to share an idea that has made itself available
> to my youngest child. My eldest is involved in drama classes
> at the local community theatre. While dropping her off one
> afternoon, I found my son conversing with one of the gentlemen
> on staff. He was inquiring to lighting, sound, and set direction
> classes. Unfortunately, the theatre does not provide any
> such classses. About a week later, a gentleman called and
> asked if my son would be interested in a job shadowing position.
> After listening to the gentlemen, I felt it my duty to inform
> him that my son was only 9 yo. He was not at all phased
> by his age and believed this was the best age to start this
> type of mentor program. Well, he's been working the past
> couple of weeks and has has had the opportunity to take
> control of lighting for some local productions.

> So, just because they don't have the programs listed
> or have maybe never thought of a mentor program, ASK! We
> have been very blessed by this opportunity and I believe
> it is giving a big boost to my son's self-esteem. Thanks
> for letting me share this morning.

> Belinda I feel stupid asking this, but what exactly is job shadowing,
and how would a 9-year-old do it? I thought it was something an older
teen or adult did--observing a job for a day to see if they would
like to do that. This must be different.

I am very interested in volunteer and work-like opportunities for
my kids, but the two things we tried were not too satisfying. In both
cases we were welcomed to volunteer, but when we got there the people
in charge seemed to be searching their minds to find us something
to do! It's not a good feeling to spend your time doing busywork!
Any suggestions, insights?

That being said, all four of my older children have been blessed with
mentor relationships that developed sometimes from paid-teacher situations
(i.e. guitar teacher), sometimes more by chance--a couple of homeschool
parents who offered freebie courses in sports and philosophy, for
example. In all cases these relationships have been very important
to my kids (especially the older ones) in taking steps away from dependence
on us and feeling confident in the outside world. The recognition
they have gotten from these other adults as people in their own right
has been great. So great, that it scares me a little how it seemed
to come to them by chance. Or maybe, really, by grace.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:01 p.m.



This story I'm about to tell is almost, but not quite, off-topic.
Several who have posted here this month have wondered how to go about
asking strangers for favors, and I've made sweeping statements about
starting small -- with requests for information, etc. Here's an anecdote
that illustrates that principle.

One of my daughters, as I've mentioned before, works in a coffee bar.
She had pointed out one of the "regulars" to me and told me he worked
at a used bookstore in town. Valuable information, because I always
make a point of cultivating the acquaintance of librarians and bookstore
people.

So one day not long ago, I walked up to him, introduced myself, and
said I'd heard that homeschoolers could get a 10% discount on books
at his store. "Is that true?" I asked.

OK, stop the story for a minute. Notice that all I did was ask him
to verify something I had heard about. That's ALL I did.

He said it was true. We made pleasant smalltalk for a couple of minutes,
and then I rejoined my son at our sidewalk table outside.

A few minutes later, this same gentleman left the coffee bar, saw
Hunter and me reading at our little table and stopped. "You know,"
he said, "if you're ever looking for a particular book, I could keep
an eye out for it and sell it to you at my own discount price."

"Wow!" I said. "That's nice of you."

"So is there anything in particular you're wanting right now?" he
asked.

Well, folks, what could I do? You don't think I could let an offer
like that go to WASTE, do you?

"Actually, yes," I said. "We're sort of on a Richard Feynman kick,
and we can't find his Caltech lecture series anywhere."

He said he'd see what he could do. Two weeks later, voila! Volume
2 of the series has materialized (at 50% off half-price). And of course,
our new acquaintance is watching for any other volumes that may come
his way.

All it took was the effrontery to walk up to someone I didn't know
and ask a simple question. Of course, I would NEVER, EVER have asked
this man to reserve a certain book for me and sell it to me at a cut-rate
price. I'm not THAT bold! :-D

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      AUTHOR:  Liz Messick
        DATE:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:21 p.m.

 Response To:  How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:01 p.m.



I have a similar story.

We moved to this neighborhood about three years ago. My now 11-year-old
daughter is an avid softball player, and last winter, she decided
she wanted to pitch for her Little League team in the spring. I knew
that an older retired gentleman in the neighborhood was a Little League
coach, but I didn't know him at all, and he didn't even coach in the
same age division as my daughter. But one afternoon, Deb and I walked
over to his house, and I introduced myself and her, and asked him
if he would consider working with Debby and teaching her to pitch.

It turns out that his own daughter, now grown, was a pitcher, and
led her high school team to the state championships a few years ago,
and that her dad was her pitching coach!

This worked out so nicely, because Deb could just call Mr. F. and
walk down the street to his house when she had some spare time. He
and his wife became very fond of her, and they came to watch her play.
She never has become much of a pitcher, but she made All-Stars as
an outfielder! (She's still working on the pitching - at least she
was until she broke her foot a couple of weeks ago!)

And now we feel more connected to the neighborhood. Just the other
day, Mrs. F. took my little 5-year-old on a tour of her lovely yard
and let her pick a bouquet of flowers and herbs to bring home.

One small question - Could you teach Deb to pitch, or do you know
someone who can? - was all it took.


               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Theater Job Shadowing-COOL!
      AUTHOR:  Debra
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 1:22 a.m.

 Response To:  Theater Job Shadowing
      Author:  Belinda
        Date:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 7:27 a.m.



I love this post! This is so neat! I think there are probably more
opportunities like this out there is kids show an interest and act
like they want to learn. Adults don't mind showing kids the ropes
if the student really wants to learn. I will have to keep this in
mind for the future (my girls are only 5 now, so this is a ways down
the road for us).

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Taking charge
      AUTHOR:  4-H and Homeschooling
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:26 a.m.

 Response To:  Taking charge
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 8:12 a.m.



Hi everyone, Just had to jump in. We started a 4-h group 6 yrs. ago.
The first year was not much fun. Only a few picked projects...etc.
Then, as the advisor I had a meeting with the other homeschool parents
and told them we had to pick a topic that would be our theme at the
next meeting. (For all you 4-her's -by the book it is a "Self-Directed"
project. Living in Ohio we chose Ohio History. Each family takes turns
plannig a field trip that has to do with Ohio. (Just the fact that
it takes place in Ohio is enough for us) Like I said, that was five
years ago and it has worked out very well. Just yesterday we went
panning for gold with a naturalist in our local park and next month
we are going to a local Hands on Science Museum to learn more about
rocks and minerals.

At the end of each year the kids put up a display at the fair with
pictures of all they have done. They also do a monthly newsletter.
I just wanted to tell you this because the 4-h folks have been extremely
cooperative with us. Mary

> Hi, Lee--

> You know, IF you have the time, energy, and desire
> (and that's supposing a lot, I realize), you could organize
> a new 4-H club in your area...or take over (i.e., fundamentally
> change) the one that already exists.

> The character of any organization is simply a reflection
> of the persons who give their time to it. That's either
> good news or bad news, depending on who's involved. The
> people who raise their hands and volunteer and are the ones
> who get to make decisions. Have you ever read (or seen)
> The Best Christmas Pageant Ever? I love that story because
> it beautifully illustrates this truth.

> We dropped out of 4-H when WE no longer felt like putting
> in the time and effort to make it the kind of club we enjoyed.
> Our attention had wandered off in other directions, and
> our energy and dedication went with it. That could be what's
> happening in your club -- the folks in charge may not care
> that much anymore, and they might be GRATEFUL to have someone
> else step in and bring new ideas.

> Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  It's taken me a week to recover from thinking I'd better
move to a ranch!
      AUTHOR:  Ann in NC
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:38 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: The other half of this month's topic
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Thursday, 8 October 1998, at 8:48 p.m.



Truly, I read Jody's and Marsha's notes and started to think that
I'd been homeschooling all wrong -- that my kids hadn't the same opportunities...(I
know, after 9 years of homeschooling, you'd think I wouldn't be COMPARING,
wouldn't you?) But after I calmed down, I realized that my kids did
have some outside learning opportunities and I thought I'd share them.

First of all, what I realized last night was that my 15 year old had
just come back from her first recording session. Our church is huge,
and my kids have had many learning opportunites with that. Last night,
for example, the choir was recording a CD, and they had asked Domenique
to play the harp for one of the songs. Now, there are tubas and trumpets
and cellos and violins and a 40+ person choir also on the song, so
the harp won't be heard that well. But what an experience for the
kid -- all the rehearsing, the time spent with the other musical adults
and teens there, and then the recording session.

The kids have also been involved in other activiites through our church
-- my eldest decided to go to our sister parish in the rain forest
of Guatemala. The group had many training sessions before the trip,
and then the trip itself was amazing.

We've also made use of the museums in town -- even though we never
sign up for the classes offered. We usually plan to visit the museum
at its least crowded time, and have had wonderful experiences that
way. When there is no one else in the room, the person in charge has
time to make a new slide for the microscope for you and answer all
your questions (the science museum), or the computers at the art museum
(what a wonderful addition that has been) are available for as long
as we need them, and the woman in charge there can help or suggest.

We also make use of a place in town called ARTSPACE. Artists are given
reduced rents for studios there in exchange for being available to
the public. So we can just walk through and see what artists are working
that day, and they are THRILLED to bring us into their studio and
explain what they are working on, and how they chose that subject.

My kids have also done all the music lessons and swim team and gymnastics
and diving (not the same kid doing everything!). I'm not usually impressed
with the other expensive classes offered here, but I've bartered with
members of my homeschooling group. So one kid studied sewing with
a friend for two years while I tutored her son in math. Others have
done art classes with another homeschool mom.

Well, time for me to get ready to go to our homeschool group. Today
is swim and gym, and then an art class for two of the kids. Next week
our group is bringing in an African Drumming Group -- our homeschool
group could also be considered an outside learning experience, too,
I guess...

Ann

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Instilling a good work ethic in our children
      AUTHOR:  4-H and Homeschooling
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:41 a.m.

 Response To:  Instilling a good work ethic in our children
      Author:  Giovanna
        Date:  Thursday, 1 October 1998, at 11:59 a.m.



This summer, our thirteen year old son was an umpire. It was his second
year. He never missed a game and all (well most all) the coaches like
him because he knows the game.

Because the head umpire saw such a good work ethic in him he was asked
to ump all the playoff games in all the leagues except for his age
group. Play-off games stupidly (sorry no other desc. fits!) get hot.
He made a call and a coach who is normally calm lost it. The opposite
coach got involved and parents gathered around the backstop. The coaches
were yelling at him, the parents were swearing at him and he remained
calm. One parent came around and wanted to talk and started swearing
too. He ejected the parent, warned the coaches if they did not remain
calm they would both forfeit the game and yelled play ball. They did.
They also called that night to apologize to my son for behaving so
badly and hoped this did not effect there off the field relationship.
It was great. We were thankful he was able to withstand the pressure
and do his job. Most of all though, we were thankful that he did not
get angry at these men, but forgave them since he really does respect
them and like them.

In addition to umping, he also played and mowed the lawns for the
three baseball fields and was paid by the league. He took it very
seriously and I think kids who are so busy with school simply want
to make money- not want to make a living and at least like what they
do let alone love it. Not bad at all for a thirteen year old. MaryN
>

> This is so wonderful to see! A 16 year old outperforming
> all other employees. Hmmm........... Does homeschooling
> instill a good work ethic in children? Would children that
> have the freedom to pursue their interests become more responsible
> than their average peer?

> I must be honest with you. Most 16 years olds I know
> do not outperform their fellow employees. Most 16 year olds
> I know call in sick when they are not really sick and arrive
> to work late. As a matter of fact I'm seeing more and more
> senior citizens at our local McDonald's and not as many
> teens. Most 16 year olds do not last at their jobs very
> long. They get very bored, very fast.

> Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  An added benefit.....
      AUTHOR:  4-H and Homeschooling
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:52 a.m.



I love when my kids get to know someone and they can be a mentor to
my kids. My kids are very good at loving them back. There are so many
lonely folks out there. People don't reach out to neighbors and such
as they used to and I think this type of homeschooling helps that
stay alive.

It just doesn't take that long for us to get our acedimics done in
a day, so after, we get out and pursue our interests and always meet
a lot of neat people. We have made some really neat contacts that
way. The biggest deal I see is people who love what they do -love
to share it! Mary

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Another theater story
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 7:51 a.m.

 Response To:  Theater Job Shadowing
      Author:  Belinda
        Date:  Sunday, 11 October 1998, at 7:27 a.m.



A few years ago, the Fort Worth Opera called the director of the theater
school Hunter attended and asked her to recommend a kid to play the
part of a slave-boy in their upcoming production of Samson and Delilah.
She gave them Hunter's name and phone number!

It was such a neat experience for him. He was the only child in the
cast, so of course everyone made a big fuss over him and went out
of their way to make him feel comfortable. My husband sat through
every single rehearsal because he was worried about pedophiles, and
in fact it was required that Hunter have an adult chaperone at all
times. What really impressed Hunter was the pyrotechnic display in
the last scene!

A couple of years later, the man who had directed Hunter in Romeo
and Juliet offered him the part of Tiny Tim in a touring production
of A Christmas Carol. The touring company would pay him $250 a week,
and would also pay $150 weekly for an adult chaperone to accompany
him. We left the choice to Hunter. On the one hand, it sounded like
the opportunity of a lifetime -- on the other hand, it would mean
he'd be far away from home (REALLY far) for a long time...AND be gone
over Thanksgiving and Christmas. Hunter decided not to go. He said
he didn't want anything badly enough to be separated from his family
during the holidays. So we all learned through that experience that
when opportunity knocks, you don't HAVE to answer!

I think homeschooling has often opened doors for our children -- doors
that are usually closed to other kids -- simply because our guys have
flexible schedules and are available during school hours. Laurel was
once able to skip to the top of a local piano teacher's long waiting
list, after I explained to the teacher that she could teach Laurel
while the other kids were in school. The museum staff was delighted
when they realized the homeschooled teen volunteers would be able
to work in the exhibits during school hours. The flexibility turns
out to be a real advantage, out in the big, wide world.

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Who is Richard Feynman and what is his Caltech series
?? (NT)
      AUTHOR:  Susan
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 9:20 a.m.

 Response To:  How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:01 p.m.



> This story I'm about to tell is almost, but not quite,
> off-topic. Several who have posted here this month have
> wondered how to go about asking strangers for favors, and
> I've made sweeping statements about starting small -- with
> requests for information, etc. Here's an anecdote that illustrates
> that principle.

> One of my daughters, as I've mentioned before, works
> in a coffee bar. She had pointed out one of the "regulars"
> to me and told me he worked at a used bookstore in town.
> Valuable information, because I always make a point of cultivating
> the acquaintance of librarians and bookstore people.

> So one day not long ago, I walked up to him, introduced
> myself, and said I'd heard that homeschoolers could get
> a 10% discount on books at his store. "Is that true?"
> I asked.

> OK, stop the story for a minute. Notice that all I
> did was ask him to verify something I had heard about. That's
> ALL I did.

> He said it was true. We made pleasant smalltalk for
> a couple of minutes, and then I rejoined my son at our sidewalk
> table outside.

> A few minutes later, this same gentleman left the coffee
> bar, saw Hunter and me reading at our little table and stopped.
> "You know," he said, "if you're ever looking
> for a particular book, I could keep an eye out for it and
> sell it to you at my own discount price."

> "Wow!" I said. "That's nice of you."
>

> "So is there anything in particular you're wanting
> right now?" he asked.

> Well, folks, what could I do? You don't think I could
> let an offer like that go to WASTE, do you?

> "Actually, yes," I said. "We're sort
> of on a Richard Feynman kick, and we can't find his Caltech
> lecture series anywhere."

> He said he'd see what he could do. Two weeks later,
> voila! Volume 2 of the series has materialized (at 50% off
> half-price). And of course, our new acquaintance is watching
> for any other volumes that may come his way.

> All it took was the effrontery to walk up to someone
> I didn't know and ask a simple question. Of course, I would
> NEVER, EVER have asked this man to reserve a certain book
> for me and sell it to me at a cut-rate price. I'm not THAT
> bold! :-D

> Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  YES!
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 9:56 a.m.

 Response To:  An added benefit.....
      Author:  4-H and Homeschooling
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:52 a.m.



> I love when my kids get to know someone and they can
> be a mentor to my kids. My kids are very good at loving
> them back. There are so many lonely folks out there. People
> don't reach out to neighbors and such as they used to and
> I think this type of homeschooling helps that stay alive.
>

> It just doesn't take that long for us to get our acedimics
> done in a day, so after, we get out and pursue our interests
> and always meet a lot of neat people. We have made some
> really neat contacts that way. The biggest deal I see is
> people who love what they do -love to share it! Mary

What you have written here is very true.

Mentors can be found EVERYWHERE.

We have neighbors who are retired and my daughter loves to visit because
they also have a pond with ducks. Well, some of those ducks had babies
and my daughter was in HEAVEN. Our neighbors loved her company and
in return she got to look at the eggs as they were hatching. They
talked with her, showed her the nest. It was sweet!

Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  I guess he's my physics mentor...
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 11:20 a.m.

 Response To:  Who is Richard Feynman and what is his Caltech series
?? (NT)
      Author:  Susan
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 9:20 a.m.



You know how we've been saying that mentors don't HAVE to be living
individuals with whom we have a personal relationship? I suppose that
explains why I've glommed onto Richard Feynman, who has taught me
more about physics through his books than my high school physics teacher
ever could.

See, I hated physics in school. Didn't understand it, didn't enjoy
it, didn't appreciate what it could teach me about the universe I
inhabit. The textbook was boring and the teacher didn't manage to
make the subject interesting. I never bothered to take physics in
college, remembering how much I had disliked it in high school.

But awhile back, I began noticing my son's interest in physics. He
asked the sort of questions that only physics could answer, so this
year I heaved a big sigh and began reading up on the subject. And
that's how I discovered Richard Feynman, who won a Nobel Prize in
physics and taught at Caltech for several years. It required someone
with *genius* to explain these concepts to me, and believe it or not,
I LOVE physics now! So my son and I have been gobbling up all the
books we can find by (and about) Richard Feynman, letting him guide
us through the wonders of probability and nuclear physics and quantum
electrodynamics. Wow!

A few years ago, when Hunter was in a major biology phase, we enjoyed
many of the books by Gerald Durrell, naturalist and zoologist. One
thing we've discovered is that we really appreciate writers who have
a well-developed sense of humor, and this is something Durrell and
Feynman share in common (and something I always find lacking in textbooks,
unfortunately).

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  ROTFL! I love this story!
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:14 p.m.

 Response To:  How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:01 p.m.



I attended a PROJECT WILD seminar this summer. The teacher was commenting
on how to find science equipment and resources for practically nothing.
This mom seemed to have a knack for finding things. After showing
all of us the cool science stuff she had she finally admitted that
she just had a "way" of being able to get things that she needed from
people in the community.

But then she said, "HEY! YOU DON'T GET BECAUSE YOU DO NOT ASK!" I
chuckled. She is right.

Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Mary, You are a good mama!
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:19 p.m.

 Response To:  Re: Instilling a good work ethic in our children
      Author:  4-H and Homeschooling
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:41 a.m.



I'm sure you are very proud of your son.

What types of things did you do to encourage such a good work ethic
in him?

Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Mary, You are a good mama!
      AUTHOR:  Mary
        DATE:  Wednesday, 14 October 1998, at 7:51 a.m.

 Response To:  Mary, You are a good mama!
      Author:  Giovanna
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:19 p.m.



Thanks, we are proud. I have to admit first of all he was one of those
children that was born responsible. You said don't go into the street
and he didn't, don't touch, etc... we thought we were doing it so
right til his little brother (the exact opposite) came along. Ha.
His little brother is wonderful too.

In all seriousness, I think I can pin point some of what we have done.
#1- We love them and make time for them and listen to them. #2- From
a young age they have helped around the house and have helped there
grandparents around their house and yard. #3-We have never pushed
academics at a young age but pursued their interests. (That was how
we got into baseball. My husband did a job for the Cleveland Indians
and they got to visit the clubhouse all the time). #4-We also have
continued to pursue our interests (hubby and I) and have always brought
the boys with us. #5- As they were mature enough and wanting to learn
more (academics) we have pursued it the same way we always have everything
else. Finding out as much about it as possible, and helping them when
they get stuck,, even if that is reminding them a job well done is
worth doing all the way. When we reach our limit, we then pursue others-
I mean people that know the subject and love it.

Aaron loves baseball, so two years ago he took umpiring class. It
was his first exposure to a "p.s. group learning situation" and he
did very well. My husband took the class with him and also got involved
with the league. He is now the commissioner and equipment manager
for our 850 kid summer league.

My husband is an electrician working at a local college and gets involved
in many great conversations with the Prof. there. THey all have love
h.s.ing. They want to do some mentoring. Jacob, loves music and science
and he has been wanting to take violin lessons and we found a wonderful
girl there (at the college) who will come to our house here for the
lessons and hang out because she is away from home and only knows
dorm life these days. We also now have access to their observatory
with a very large telescope.

We are certainly not experts, my kids can be as foolish as the next,
in other words it is not a perfect life. It is however the best I
can imagine it to be. When they are allowed to pursue something they
love and taught how to pursue it, I believe it builds lifelong success
skills for them. It is a life style- home education. We are constantly
changing the old and adding to the new. Because it is our lifestyle,
people notice and that lends to us so many opportunities. Sorry, didn't
mean to go on so long. I hope that covers it a little bit and helps
some to relax a bit and enjoy their families. Mary

> I'm sure you are very proud of your son.

> What types of things did you do to encourage such a
> good work ethic in him?

> Giovanna

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Fascinating! Thank you, Mary
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Wednesday, 14 October 1998, at 8:40 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: Mary, You are a good mama!
      Author:  Mary
        Date:  Wednesday, 14 October 1998, at 7:51 a.m.



I think one reason I'm enjoying this month's topic so much is that
it lends itself naturally to success stories. Mary, I have such a
clear mental image of your family -- active, involved, and passionate.
It's a lovely picture of a thriving home.

I think you spelled it out so well in your five "points," and I especially
like the first one: "We love them and make time for them and listen
to them." Wow! That says it in a nutshell. Nearly all parents feel
they love their children, but expressing that love by spending time
with them and listening to them is the part many parents have trouble
with.

Truthfully, the way our culture is set up right now, most parents
find it difficult to spend time with the kids. When we first began
homeschooling, there was a common belief that parents who choose to
keep their children at home were over-attached, over-protective, over-controlling,
and unwilling to "let go." But I think people everywhere are finally
(maybe?) beginning to appreciate the benefits of attachment-style
parenting. Thanks again for the great post, Mary.

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: YES!Yes again!
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 12:29 p.m.

 Response To:  YES!
      Author:  Giovanna
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 9:56 a.m.



This isn't quite a mentor reply, but similar...

I sent my 12yod to McDonalds while I ran a quick errand across the
street and had her pick up our lunch. When I came back after her,
she said, "Mom, that old lady that waited on me was so nice. I really
would rather be waited on by old people than kids."

I thought, is this partly due to the fact that since we homeschool
and deal with adults in everyday life, it is easy to relate to adults?
She also must see that the older folks seem to really care about the
"person" rather than the "getting done with this job" attitude that
some younger kids have.

I was pleased! Jody

>

>

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 12:42 p.m.

 Response To:  How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Monday, 12 October 1998, at 11:01 p.m.



I've had similar success with our local library. Since we homeschool
and use the library weekly, we are very familiar with the help and
the head librarian.

This fall I was working on our history curriculum using the library.
Pat, the head librarian, stopped and asked what I was working on and
if I needed any help. I showed her that I was using some of the Greenleaf
Press books as a guide to our history. She asked to look at the catalog
and then went through the entire section with a pencil and marked
each one that she knew the library had. Then she made special notations
about books that might be helpful and similar to some in the catalog.

In a matter of a few minutes, I had a complete list of books we could
use from our own public library.

Maybe it doesn't hurt that I occasionally bring in homemade chocolate
chip cookies and bread for the librarians!! Be a friend, get a friend!

Jody


               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: It's taken me a week to recover from thinking I'd
better move to a ranch!
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 12:53 p.m.

 Response To:  It's taken me a week to recover from thinking I'd better
move to a ranch!
      Author:  Ann in NC
        Date:  Tuesday, 13 October 1998, at 5:38 a.m.



>

> Truly, I read Jody's and Marsha's notes and started
> to think that I'd been homeschooling all wrong -- that my
> kids hadn't the same opportunities...(I know, after 9 years
> of homeschooling, you'd think I wouldn't be COMPARING, wouldn't
> you?) But after I calmed down, I realized that my kids did
> have some outside learning opportunities and I thought I'd
> share them.

> Dear Ann,

Me too!! When I read your post, I thought the same thing! Since we
are very rural, we never get the experiences that you and yours do.
After 9 years of homeschooling for me, you'd think I'd not be comparing
either! But I think we all do. We all want the best for our kids and
want them to have all that they possibly can...right??

I'm finally content, that we are all to "bloom where we are planted"
and be content. Not that we don't try to find all the opportunities
that we can, but we must learn to know the things that are right under
our very noses.

For us, that means, what kind of grasses are out in this pasture?
Which ones do the cows/sheep like? What are kinds of trees can we
grow in this "grass country" (very few we now know). What are the
native birds, reptiles, mammals, plants? I think that many of us could
not tell someone what the native trees are of our area. Can you?

Just rambling......Jody

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Jody, you sound just like me! :-)
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 3:38 p.m.

 Response To:  Re: How to be an opportunist (without even trying very
hard)
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 12:42 p.m.



Librarians are definitely a homeschooler's best friends. Did you know
there's a book in print that discusses how librarians can do a better
job of helping their homeschooling patrons? (Our library ordered it
because they have so many of us to contend with. *smile*)

One thing I learned -- to my dismay -- when I worked at our library,
is that not ALL homeschoolers are popular with librarians. Oh, no!
But it's true. Some homeschooling moms, it seems, *expect* the librarians
to do their research for them. In other words, they'll march into
the library wanting someone else to put together a curriculum for
them. Or they'll expect the library to buy all the materials in a
certain commercial curriculum, just because they don't want to pay
for it themselves. Or they'll drop their young children off at the
library and leave them there unattended...for hours! The horror stories
I heard made me feel AWFUL.

But by the same token, many homeschooling families are among our librarians
FAVORITE patrons. The parents and kids are always looking for interesting
things; they're polite and respectful of library property; and sometimes
they even bring cookies, like Jody!!! (Or fresh produce from the garden,
or wildflower bouquets for the librarian's desk.)

It's one thing to ask for help. It's quite another to expect someone
else to do all your leg-work for you. When I worked at the circulation
desk, I met patrons who had just taken their kids out of school and
wanted "the homeschool program." They thought we could just hand over
all the materials they'd need, and they were surprised to learn that
THEY might have to do a little research! Yikes! (It scared me.)

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Further reflections on being an opportunist
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 7:11 p.m.



I attended a writers' conference over the weekend, and one of the
speakers was the wonderful Jane Yolen (author of Owl Moon). She said
something that really rang my chimes:

"Be PREPARED for serendipity."

The emphasis on the word *prepared* is there for a good reason: Once
our thoughts are bent in a certain direction, we're more likely to
recognize an opportunity opening up IN THAT DIRECTION.

In a way, this is stretching the definition, since -- technically
-- serendipity means stumbling across something wonderful that you
weren't even looking for in the first place...an accidental discovery.

When the bookstore guy at the coffee bar (see my earlier post on "how
to be an opportunist") asked me if there were any particular books
I was looking for, I had a ready answer, even though I wasn't expecting
anyone to ask me that question. Because I knew what I wanted, I was
able to take full advantage of that "serendipitous" offer.

When I came home from the writers' conference, I looked up at the
wall next to my desk (where I collect all my favorite quotes)...and
had to smile. I think Jane Yolen and I must read the same books, because
here's the quote that has been up on my wall the longest:

"Creativity has to do with being prepared...prepared to put your foot
on some serendipitous bridge in the fog that turns out to be draped
with morning glories and leads to exactly the right place." --Chase
Collins

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Great point Cerelle!
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 9:01 p.m.

 Response To:  Further reflections on being an opportunist
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Thursday, 15 October 1998, at 7:11 p.m.



I love this quote! How perfect!

> "Creativity has to do with being prepared...prepared
> to put your foot on some serendipitous bridge in the fog
> that turns out to be draped with morning glories and leads
> to exactly the right place." --Chase Collins

Knowing what you needed at the right moment is so helpful and needed.
I have a mental and paper list of some of the authors I am looking
for, so when I go to an antique shop or anywhere that might be selling
old books, I know just who I'm looking for. I've found many bargains
in this manner for 1 or 2 dollars!

Jody

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      AUTHOR:  Lacie
        DATE:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



what would you be teaching? Basically, what do all of you do for a
living or for fun? I am a *Jill-of-all-trades-expert-of-none* isn't
the true name for that type of person...MOM? My husband is a logger/road
builder/businessman by profession and a hunter, fisherman hobbyist.
If you would like to ask him about his work just e-mail. Lacie

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  I'd have to go with writing, but...
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 6:14 p.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



...now that I think about it, I've also taught quiltmaking classes,
helped a lot of people learn to turn out perfect bread loaves, and
tried to spread the gospel of organic gardening.

My husband is a furniture maker by trade, but he also knows everything
there is to know about house construction. And he knows more about
European history than anyone I've ever met.

Now if only we had a mathematician in the immediate family! *sigh*

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 8:41 p.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



> what would you be teaching? Basically, what do all
> of you do for a living or for fun?

Lacie,

In our home it would probably be astronomy or anything space related
(astronauts, space exploration, etc). Right now we are all very busy
keeping up with John Glenn and counting down to his launch. We even
went to Kennedy Space Center and took a picture of his shuttle on
the launch pad.

And I'd also say that we'd enjoy disciplining and teaching others
about the Bible--especially children.

Today, Sea World had a special "homeschool day" and we were able to
attend at half the price of the regular admission price. My parents
also went with us and we had a lot of fun. TONS of homeschoolers there.

On the way home we were talking about homeschooling and my mom commented
on how much I had "learned" since I started homeschooling. I laughed
and agreed. I'm learning things now that I never knew before! Right
now we are all enthralled with Christopher Columbus and by reading
books with my children even I'm learning. We are very much interested
in history in our home. But you know what? It was never like that
before. I'm rambling off the subject here but for a moment, on that
car ride home, I realized how wonderful it is that we can become interested
in things at different points in our lives. Learning never ends, does
it? If you were to have asked me this same question a year ago I would
have never said astronomy.

G.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  It's usually the math...
      AUTHOR:  Ann in NC
        DATE:  Saturday, 17 October 1998, at 4:52 a.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



>The times I have done it, I've helped people with math. I guess it
could also be music, although I don't consider myself an expert. There
are so many professional musicians out there, that I suspect people
would be more likely to make use of them.

I do think my main mentoring has been in helping people find out what
they need to know. I'm excellent at searching out activities to go
with different interests...so I can find a museum exhibit about whatever,
or a concert of Baroque music, and so forth... Which is why I love
homeschooling --- gives me the chance to do that on a daily basis!


My husband is also a mathematician...but he is more into applied math,
so he would be a great person for physics or computer help. He's also
into Tai Chi.

Ann

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Sunday, 18 October 1998, at 9:47 a.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



Lacie,

What a good idea...to list what we think we're good at to offer a
bit of mentoring!

I'm quite like you...MOM. I enjoy gardening, canning, some quilting,
I raise chickens (for eggs and meat), I help my husband in every aspect
of ranching (cattle & sheep). Ranching is all we do. We run a working
ranch with 350 cows (Hereford purbred) and we sell bulls and usually
have 150 on the ranch at all times. We have reduced our sheep numbers
to 300 head (just can't quit being shepherds).

My "love" at this time, is nature. I take lots of walks out here on
the prairie and try to identify plants, birds, animals, mushrooms,
grasses and all. The children and I keep nature journals regularly
with all our "finds" in them. My step mom just got me a book on mushroom
identification (so I don't poison the children)!

You may email me too if you wish!

Jody

> what would you be teaching? Basically, what do all
> of you do for a living or for fun? I am a *Jill-of-all-trades-expert-of-none*
> isn't the true name for that type of person...MOM? My husband
> is a logger/road builder/businessman by profession and a
> hunter, fisherman hobbyist. If you would like to ask him
> about his work just e-mail. Lacie

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  hmmmm
      AUTHOR:  leslie
        DATE:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 4:30 a.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



I dabble in many things, but don't see myself as an expert on any
of them. I enjoy gardening, sewing, and birding. Dh would go with
electronics. That was his field before he got caught up in the "fire
fighting" end of management. He is thrilled to be able to get back
to hands on with our son.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Nature walks
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 6:25 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Sunday, 18 October 1998, at 9:47 a.m.



Jody,

We love to learn about all the stuff living and growing wild on our
property, too. When the kids were younger, we really got into the
"edible weeds" thing. It gave us a whole new appreciation for some
of the so-called "pest plants" that always threatened to take over
the place. We found out that even greenbrier tips taste wonderful
in salads. (Yucca shoots are pretty nasty, though, even though they
LOOK just like asparagus...)

One spring, my husband was suffering from a terrible sinus infection
that antibiotics weren't curing. The man was too sick to work, eat,
or sleep. In desperation, I went out and dug up the roots of some
wild echinacea growing on our hillside. The tea from those roots was
a miracle cure! That really impressed us, believe me. Since then,
we've had even MORE respect for nature's bounty!

Good old Mother Earth makes a pretty good mentor, herself. :-)

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      AUTHOR:  Marsha in MI
        DATE:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 3:08 p.m.

 Response To:  If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Lacie
        Date:  Friday, 16 October 1998, at 4:18 p.m.



I'm a freelance writer and the ladies in our support group asked me
to teach writing a couple of years ago. This year we started a more
formal homeschool co-op and they asked me to teach creative writing.
I was dubious but I'm enjoying it.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Veterans of War...
      AUTHOR:  Jody
        DATE:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 6:27 p.m.



Dear All,

A hsing friend of mine recently told me of a visit they had with their
neighbors. He is a WWII veteran. After their visit about many war
stories, the kids went home and wrote down 2 questions each to ask
him. He typed out his responses for them as well as gave them copies
of pictures, maps of his tours of the war and other tokens of the
times. They were all elated at his sharing a very important part of
his life.

Another type of mentoring of sorts?

Jody


               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Veterans of War...
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 6:58 p.m.

 Response To:  Veterans of War...
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Monday, 19 October 1998, at 6:27 p.m.



What a wonderful opportunity! Yes, I definitely think that's a kind
of mentoring. Years ago, our homeschool support group met with a Holocaust
survivor. This was someone who didn't ordinarily talk about his experiences,
but when asked to speak informally with a group of children, he agreed
to meet with us at the park and reminisce. It was a very moving experience.

He didn't dwell on life in the concentration camp, but he did talk
about what it was like when the Nazis moved into Poland -- he was
a young teenager at the time. The children realized they were hearing
something important, first hand, and they asked intelligent questions.
None of us will forget that meeting.

I think it's so important for kids to hear the stories that the older
generation can tell. In the absence of extended families living near
one another, it's good to take advantage of the proximity of older
neighbors and friends.

We have a wonderful little book by Marjorie Kahl Lawrence called This
Is the Way It Used to Be in the Early 1900's. It's written for children,
and it tells about daily life, making bread and butter, what people
did when they were sick, butchering livestock, playing games, and
amusements before TV. It's not the kind of history that's played out
in wars or governments -- just a quiet, everyday kind of history,
told in first-person. (Kind of like Little House in the Big Woods,
but not fictionalized.) We also love Tasha Tudor's A Time to Keep.

My children love to hear their grandmothers talk about what life was
like when they were children, especially when there's mischief involved!
;-) They enjoy hearing the stories again and again. "Tell about when
you used to throw frogs through the trolley-car windows," they beg.
LOL!

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Canning, Mushrooms and Chickens
      AUTHOR:  Lacie
        DATE:  Wednesday, 21 October 1998, at 6:27 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: If you or your family was asked to be a mentor....
      Author:  Jody
        Date:  Sunday, 18 October 1998, at 9:47 a.m.



Hi Jody,

We've been canning apple pie filling and now I would like to can some
potatoes. Have you ever canned those and do you have any tips?

Nature...I purchased a video 2 years ago so I could learn about herbs
and wild plants...I have yet to watch it. That's so pathetic! My FIL
was into mushrooms for a while and taught my kids just enough to get
them into trouble;) One of my sons is quite a daredevil and ate a
wild mushroom because his cousins dared him to. I think I made an
impression on him never to ever do that again. It's scarey when mom
comes "unglued"!

Chickens...we have had some for about 6 months. Do we need to do anything
special for them during the winter? Thanks,Lacie

> What a good idea...to list what we think we're good
> at to offer a bit of mentoring!

> I'm quite like you...MOM. I enjoy gardening, canning,
> some quilting, I raise chickens (for eggs and meat), I help
> my husband in every aspect of ranching (cattle & sheep).
> Ranching is all we do. We run a working ranch with 350 cows
> (Hereford purbred) and we sell bulls and usually have 150
> on the ranch at all times. We have reduced our sheep numbers
> to 300 head (just can't quit being shepherds).

> My "love" at this time, is nature. I take
> lots of walks out here on the prairie and try to identify
> plants, birds, animals, mushrooms, grasses and all. The
> children and I keep nature journals regularly with all our
> "finds" in them. My step mom just got me a book
> on mushroom identification (so I don't poison the children)!
>

> You may email me too if you wish!

> Jody

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  A legal question....
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 4:07 a.m.



Does a child need a work permit to do unpaid "volunteer" work in a
business? Or in a museum?

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: A legal question....
      AUTHOR:  leslie
        DATE:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 4:58 a.m.

 Response To:  A legal question....
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 4:07 a.m.



My daughter worked as a volunteer in the local hospital and didn't
need one. It might differ from state to state, I don't know.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Thanks
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 5:23 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: A legal question....
      Author:  leslie
        Date:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 4:58 a.m.



I wondered about it. If your daughter didn't need one, I'm sure mine
won't either. It probably would not vary by state because the work
permit is a federal thing.

>

> My daughter worked as a volunteer in the local hospital
> and didn't need one. It might differ from state to state,
> I don't know.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Work permits
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 6:49 a.m.

 Response To:  A legal question....
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 4:07 a.m.



Lee, mine never needed one to volunteer at the library or museum (beginning
at age 12). Privately-owned businesses, I don't know about. When Laurel
went to work at the coffee bar, at 15, THEY had to fill out special
government forms in order to hire someone her age, but she didn't
have to do anything special.

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Work permits
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 7:09 a.m.

 Response To:  Work permits
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Thursday, 22 October 1998, at 6:49 a.m.



When my kids have had paying jobs, they have had to go to the local
high school's assistant principal for a work permit. Last time, he
asked some quesions about their hs'ing. In order to avoid confrontations,
I haven't let them get any more jobs until they're 18. I just haven't
felt it's worth the hassle. BUT for experience in a field they might
be interested in, I'm considering the volunteer route.

> Lee, mine never needed one to volunteer at the library
> or museum (beginning at age 12). Privately-owned businesses,
> I don't know about. When Laurel went to work at the coffee
> bar, at 15, THEY had to fill out special government forms
> in order to hire someone her age, but she didn't have to
> do anything special.

> Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Modeling
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Sunday, 25 October 1998, at 3:25 p.m.



My dd has been bugging me for a couple years about getting into modeling.
She has the right stature and poise for this kind of job but since
I know nothing about this field, it scares me to think of what she
might run into. It occurred to me that there may be some sort of mentor-type
opportunity we could look into. However, that's as far as I got. Does
anybody have any suggestions for us? Dd is 16 BTW.

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Re: Modeling
      AUTHOR:  Cerelle
        DATE:  Sunday, 25 October 1998, at 8:51 p.m.

 Response To:  Modeling
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Sunday, 25 October 1998, at 3:25 p.m.



Lee, do you live in or near a metropolitan area? I'm not terribly
knowledgable about this sort of thing, myself, but I'd say your best
bet is to check with local talent agencies. If your daughter is serious
about giving modeling a try, she'll need a portfolio of photographs
("head shots," etc.). The talent agencies may be able to guide you
along these lines.

I recommend finding someone, somehow, who could clue you in to which
agencies have the best reputation. It IS a dog-eat-dog world out there!
But she could start by auditioning for locally produced ads, and you
can tag along until you feel comfortable with the situation. (At least,
this is what I would do.)

Another avenue might be to check with major department stores, to
see if they have runway events and auditions for those. They may also
be able to recommend reputable folks, locally, who could advise your
daughter.

Good luck!

Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Thanks
      AUTHOR:  Lee
        DATE:  Monday, 26 October 1998, at 4:46 a.m.

 Response To:  Re: Modeling
      Author:  Cerelle
        Date:  Sunday, 25 October 1998, at 8:51 p.m.



We live about 45 miles from a major city. She has found all the modeling
agencies there and wants me to take her. I HATE driving in that traffic
but suppose I'll have to do it. Might check out the major dept. stores
too as you suggested.

> Lee, do you live in or near a metropolitan area? I'm
> not terribly knowledgable about this sort of thing, myself,
> but I'd say your best bet is to check with local talent
> agencies. If your daughter is serious about giving modeling
> a try, she'll need a portfolio of photographs ("head
> shots," etc.). The talent agencies may be able to guide
> you along these lines.

> I recommend finding someone, somehow, who could clue
> you in to which agencies have the best reputation. It IS
> a dog-eat-dog world out there! But she could start by auditioning
> for locally produced ads, and you can tag along until you
> feel comfortable with the situation. (At least, this is
> what I would do.)

> Another avenue might be to check with major department
> stores, to see if they have runway events and auditions
> for those. They may also be able to recommend reputable
> folks, locally, who could advise your daughter.

> Good luck!

> Cerelle

               ========================================

     MESSAGE:  Just be careful
      AUTHOR:  Giovanna
        DATE:  Monday, 26 October 1998, at 5:03 a.m.

 Response To:  Thanks
      Author:  Lee
        Date:  Monday, 26 October 1998, at 4:46 a.m.



> We live about 45 miles from a major city. She has found
> all the modeling agencies there and wants me to take her.
> I HATE driving in that traffic but suppose I'll have to
> do it. Might check out the major dept. stores too as you
> suggested.

There are "agencies" out there that are out to take your money. If
any agency somehow wants money for your daughter to model, go somewhere
else. Your daughter shouldn't have to pay to model. They should be
paying her.

Giovanna

               ========================================


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